another one of those days

yet another day of lazy-ism. the attempt clearly failed yesterday. spent hours on the computer like i shouldn't AGAIN. the online habit is now back. my fingers are twitching and itching again. oh god! how can i even concentrate on studying now? some help here? *sighs*

probably my affirmation yesterday didn't work as well as i planned. it clearly was a disaster. or else i wouldn't be stuck to this ever so interesting rectangle screen again and my fingers wouldn't be moving along these square little buttons on the keyboard connected to this rectangle screen. when will i ever learn my lesson, i wonder.

i haven't learnt my lesson eventhough yes, i've failed my exams. eventhough it was just a july monthly test, as everyone says, the scar forever remains in my heart and my memory. however, that didn't change much of my attitude towards studies and teach me a valuable lesson, did it? i suppose my only hope left is myself. i should probably google how to make studies interesting and spend like another few hours reading and digesting it while that few hours can actually cramp some biology facts or probably history into this itsy-bitsy-tinnie-winnie brain of mine.

yes, i do miss my life during those days where i can actually do well in my exam. i think i can equate my current situation to the downfall of a person's career. that A which used to be so easy to grasp is like a million miles away from me now. working hard towards it is one thing but getting it is another thing. probably i'm not working hard enough to get to it with my present situation. the ratio of going online to studying is like 5:1. pretty useless huh?

selling the computer would cause too much pain in me. having it in front of me when i can't even use it causes more pain. self control, strong will-power, strong determination is what i currently need to cure myself. till then, wish me luck in persuing my dreams of doing well in exam which i think i just blew it in the last two papers. *sighs* hopefully you wouldn't see another post until the next month... then, i'm officially sucessful! =)

psyched up for exams?

the attempt to psych myself for physics yesterday was just a failure, unfortunately. *sighs* any effective tips on this? spent like hours over hours online. then watched tv. get what i mean when i say i'm always doing the wrong thing at the wrong time. even i can't figure out what my problem is. but was really restless yesterday. the proof that i actually attempted to psych myself for physics.

the condition of my room. more precise, my bed. even my mum couldn't stand it. don't even ask me how i slept. but yeah, that was what happened to me. i discovered that it was easier to study on the bed than the table. don't ask me why. probably its brighter at my bed rather than my study table. pfft. what an excuse.

the paper was not that tough actually. but when i was doing paper 3, my brain literally jammed and i just stared straight at the paper with a blank mind. its not that the questions are hard. my brain must have overworked (from enjoying too much). therefore, i hope my brain will also be jammed when i receive my results. then i'll just stare at it blankly regardless good or bad. =)

now, i'm enjoying myself to the max before going back to psych for bio, sejarah, blah and blah. i came up with an affirmation, no matter how lazy i am, i can do my exam. hopefully it works. shall practice saying it over and over again in front of the mirror. till then, cheerio! =)

doing the wrong thing at the wrong time

*sighs* updating and managing my blog at the WRONG TIME. its exam season now. suppose to be facing stacks of books instead of facing the computer screen.

yup! this blog has been sort of dead and neglected. but i'm updating it at the wrong time. *sighs* anyway, i've decided to resurrect my blog with a new look. hope it gives it a fresher look. like what is always said, the start of a new beginning. one thing i've learnt, managing a blog is actually not that easy. or maybe that is only for me.

okay, i think its time for me to put on those thick glasses and start turning into a nerd. yeah, someone here is actually wishing to be a nerd. any tips? *sighs* back to the stacks of physics books waiting patiently for me. physics shall be my best friend until tomorrow ends. till then, wish me luck that i'll still be alive by the end of this month when exam ends. boohoo! =(

white charm!

my aunt and her family came down to visit me recently. my uncle, an australian, likes to be called as a "guai lou" which means white guy in cantonese. anyway, they came to my house a few days ago. my "guai lou" uncle wanted to get some beer. so he walked up to the nearby sundry shops to get the beers. to get to the nearby sundry shops from my house, you'll have to cross 2 main roads. so as my uncle was waiting at the road side to cross the raod, a lady who was driving pass him on the main road was staring at him. it seems she looked like she hasn't seen a "guai lou" in her life before. unfortunately, before she knew, BAAAM!!! she banged into the car in front of her. my uncle got so scared that he fled from the scene. lol. my aunt teased my uncle saying that the lady is probably cursing him right now. my family and i were telling my aunt that at least my uncle still have some "attraction" in him. and my aunt said, "probably the woman was thinking, 'omg! a white man with feminine attraction!'". lol. anyway, the whole point of the story was a poor lady was involved in a car accident because of my white uncle. lol! =)

finally!

*exhales deeply* is there such an expression? anyway, its been donkey years since i've updated my blog. no wonder my friends regard my blog as a dead blog where you have to wait till the cows come home for it to be updated. it is probably due to the busy-ness again. *sigh*

ms venisha asked us to write a poem for our fathers in reply to the "If" poem for father's day. i know, fathers day was like donkey years ago. anyway, we got into groups. angie and i joined mei fong, pravitra and andrea. suddenly, ms venisha popped out of nowhere and asked either andrea or pravitra to move to another group. they are the only indians in our group and teacher wants to move one of them. don't ask me why. racism perhaps? nah, let's just drop the subject in order to keep my head. XD

so, we were thinking of what to write for the poem and this was what we came up with.

I am your daughter
You are my father
I am young and
You are old
I am learning
You have taught me well
I am like the capati
You are like the dhal when
I am down
You spice up my life
I love you and
You love me.

btw, the 1st four lines and the capati and dhal was mei fong's idea. laugh all you want but do not copy! lol. oh! and we have fulfilled ms venisha's request. we have symbol and repetition. oh no! we forgot personification. nah, its okie. with mei fong's brilliant poem writing skill, i'm sure we'll come up with something. till then, cheers! =)